When friends come to visit

    Last weekend we had the privilege of having Canaan's birth siblings and birth mom over for dinner. This was the first time in a year we had seen them, after they had lived with us for a year while their mom and dad worked things out in their lives.
    I waited until the last minute to tell the kids they were coming because I didn't want them to be disappointed and when I told them, you would have thought someone famous was coming to visit. They kept saying, "I can't wait any longer! When will they be here?"
    My oldest said it perfectly when she stated, "Time flies but love stays." Our experience with these kiddos and their Mama have set us on a course that we can not change as we plunge forward with foster care placements. We understand that to love kids, we need to choose to love their parents too. It's so important for the kids even while it seems scary to us foster parents/adoptive parents. I would encourage you to change your perspective about the biological parents. Love them. Right where they are at. Love them. Encourage them to be better people. Teach them. Give them HOPE. As you walk along side their kids and love them, walk alongside the bio parents too. I promise you that you will not regret it, if your heart is in the right place.
   Saying all that, you need to know that it has taken me a LONG time to see this perspective. A. Long. Time. I made so many mistakes. I chose poorly with my words many times.  I didn't see them as Christ sees them. I'm ashamed of that. It's not who I want to be and not who Christ called me to be.
   So, our relationship with our new placements biological parents has just begun. Its awkward but simple. They obviously love their children. They have begun to go to church with us on Sunday mornings. It's so awesome and crazy. The kiddos are slated to return to them and it leaves us with the question of what kind if relationship will continue. With the kids in the picture above, it was easy as they are Canaan's birth moms kids. We have a very open adoption with her so we knew that even though they left to a poor situation with their birth father, we would see them again. With these kids, it has to be more intentional and specific. If you have any advice of how to go from here, please say so! We are considering inviting them for Christmas and possibly Thanksgiving too. That's a lot! However, when the kids see that we have a relationship with their parents, it sets them at ease a bit.
    Adding so many "extras" to your family makes things pretty crazy but the blessings are pretty crazy too!